Tuesday, July 31, 2012

Psychoses V (grand finale)

Insomniac for 9 months
i confronted my demons
Whispers in my head drive me to wonder
About life and its meaning
Why am I here
Do you think
Do you think
Do you think
Voices and visions from far distance
My days and nights seemed endless
My suffering seemed shoreless
And then it was all ended
I was a newborn
Under the calm craziness of the night
I regained my sanity
And the nonsense passion for vengeance
But from whom
And for whom sake
But I didn’t want my brain to work
I needed a hideout from my thoughts
And so I went silenced
3 days of calmness
Was it serenity precedes insanity of a storm
I cried and cried and cried for months
Wetting the verses of holiness with my hopeless tears
And I’m the cold hearted that have never known tears
I’m the fearless hopeless who knows no petty
I’m the one who treasure the present
I have no regrets for the past
And no plans for tomorrow
I’m the one who Mocks pain and sorrow
But I’m the one with hysteric madness
That blows every once and a while leaves nothing but ashes of marvels
Beneath this crazy calm lies a sleeping volcano
And I saw marvelous gift of the beginning of life
And I so that life giving up to soon
Would heaven shed a tear for me
Or heaven would weep for her
Would heaven deny a sinner
Or would it aid the pure spirit
I felt wholeness
Whispers and visions from all the distance
Sufferings and rejoice
Prayers and songs
The good and the bad
Old and new
Chanting and blasphemies
Life and deaths
All came together
And I felt I am one with the very soul of heaven
Emerging from blind dark core of hell
But I felt alive
A reborn
Revived from all my doubts
And I had but one faith
I am the designer of my destiny
Under the eyes of the lord
Watching my steps
Leading me to no frustration
I and I alone own this moment
And tomorrow is a new day
Smiled at an angel
Frowned at evil
Like a black terrified cat
under the eye of the sun
with no memories remain
I conquered my demons

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