Monday, November 26, 2012

If I die Tonight

If I die tonight
I lived my life
I have no regrets
For what I’ve done
I had all fun
But it wasn’t fun
What’s done is done
I had so many beers
I shed so many tears
I scared away all my fears
And I’m still alive
It wasn’t fun
I didn’t feel the light or the warmth of the sun
I didn’t enjoy the cool breeze of summer’s night
I didn’t fight
I didn’t fight
I didn’t fight for what I stand for
I’m still thirsty for some more
More fun
More full moons
More of the warm sun
If tonight I drop dead
I won’t be afraid
Because I’ve done so well in my life
And I was a good kid
I enjoyed all the beers
And all the tears just set me free
To be as I wanted to be
I don’t repent
And if I die tonight
I’m no fighter
But I did fight
To make throw the darkest night
And I conquered all my fears
With nothing but bittersweet tears
And I will yearn
The good all days
When I was free
To be what I wanted to be
Not my mold made me
And if I die tonight
I’ll have no regrets for my life
I’ll feel alive
Because I left so many smiles
On many faces
And all the memories
In many places
If I die tonight
I won’t miss this life
Because you were my life
And I miss you
Until we reunite
Please angle of death
Come and collect my soul
Reap my nick
I’m just sick
Of being alive
And feeling dead
Without her in my life
I’m just a zombie
A living dead

Tuesday, November 20, 2012

i knew it's you

I love you
Like no other ever loved
Like I can’t live without you
For a moment without you is eternity of emptiness
I love you be mine I am thine so be mine because I loved you
Unconditionally I’m insane
So ease my pain
Be mine again
For a moment without you is eternity in hell of sorrow
My heart turns hollow with screaming crows
Waiting for tomorrow
When our fingers mingle
I feel tingle
For a moment without you is eternity in hell of emptiness
I feel dread
I feel I’m dead
For a smile a mile away as the air carries your scent
And your light of your eyes you light my heart
Scaring crows away
Hold me tight
Bring the white of doves
Calms my heart
Eternal peace between your arms
For your laughter is my Eden
Be mine until nothing tears us apart
I’m thine
And my love toward you
Has no end and no beginning
I knew
I knew it’s you
When we first met
I knew how I felt
In your Elysium my heart flew like a feather
Like no other
I loved you
Because I loved you so be mine I’m yours be mine I loved you

Saturday, November 17, 2012

psychoses XII permanent traveler

The voice of sadness too bleak too weak
The pain though hurts beyond any
Tears refuse to flow
As the heart overflows
Sobs stay hidden beneath
As a sigh escapes
Lips sealed
Heart mended
Yet a sea of emotions floats in my eyes
my feelings are dispersed within hearts that I can't find
and I feel crumbled into myself without you by my side
emotions so strong and I can't contain
my hands tremble
I feel weak
I can't speak
my soul is scattered into too many eyes i can't meet
but I’m drowning into my own lake of fire
as the eyes I want to meet
I can no longer seek
And as I wonder in the streets
In the café
On the sidewalk to the garden
Near the lake
I feel lost
In too many places
I see you in all the faces
I feel lost
I’m everywhere
In the past where we said our first I love you
A permanent traveler
When we said our vows
About the future
And now you’re gone
I feel lost in the timeline
Abandoned like an old church
Neglected like an old book on a shelf of that church
I feel unholy
Omitted rhyme on that book that was wiped
I wipe my tears
But one escapes into the lake
My reflection waves
And I see you in my heart
A broken smile
One last rhyme
I feel lost like a green leaf on that leak fell too early
With all the widows
I’m the youngest
One last tear that I won’t sob
We’ll meet again in a dream

Psychoses XI All In vain

Too much caffeine
Too much sorrow
Endless pain
My happy days seem far away
True love gone in vain
I was mad
Mad about her
And when she left
Now I’m insane
Too many voices in my head
I thought she’s dead
And I was dead
Without her in my life
Screaming in the blue noise
Suppressing my voice
And no one can hear me
Too much yells in vain
She gave me joy
She gave me hope in tomorrow
Now she’s gone
Too many plans
Too many prayers
All in vain
All in vain
Too much love gone in vain
One chance that I wasted
Too much love gone in vain
One voice in my head is too much for being insane
Too much time
Too many rhymes
I adore her still
All in vain
I recovered
Back from death
I adore her still
Before I shoot her off my life
Ill drop dead
I’m ill
Too much love gone in vain
All my life
All my dreams for tomorrow
Without her
All gone in vain

Wednesday, November 14, 2012

Psychoses X one voice

What can I say to find that pleasure?
One smile of yours
Deep within and all in between
One voice in my head
Or a million attempt
Until the moment I’m dead
One voice in my head prevails
Never give her up
And all dies down
What should I do to gain your trust to gain your love
I think I’m givin up
I think I can’t stop
Can’t stop lovin you
My dearest of all
My one and only
My all
I can't take it any more
And I think you don't love me back
A sudden death
A heart attack
Brain damaged
My soul is wounded
I’ve been in love before
I’ve been to hell before
But never like this
Nothing like that smile
In the psychotic head
May be I’m dead
Before you really smiled at me
And I’m in love with every smile you smiled and I’ve never seen
Every laughter of your sweet lips
Every time I think how sweet would be your kiss
Every teardrop
A heavy rain
And every...
Every time I try to let go
I see you in a dream
It’s all hazy
Enough… never enough
It’s just crazy I’m bound to my chains
Everlasting pain
Without you
And I can't let go
One voice in my head

Monday, November 12, 2012


Can't you see
She means the world to me
And the world won't let us be
Like a bird in her cage
Like a whale away from the ocean was thrown in the dead sea
whenever i raid her chamber
Under the blue moonlight
Drawn by the light of her darkest sphere bewitched eyes
Sparkle of diamonds on her nick burning with desire at night
Curved foxy smile welcomes me right
Waterfall rubbing smoothie chest of Persian precious stones
As you see your face on her lustrous breast
As she's all lost in her Swagger to her mirror and the brush
It's the heat of the night or the fire in my heart her cheeks blush
was she shy or the wine got her high
As she saw me on the mirror she let a moan i let a sigh
Reddish dark silky of her hair as we held tight
Aroma of her fragrance get me stoned at sight
Even if she hasn't used any perfume her scent flight
Wild Thoroughbred mare free of saddle
As she danced to my music all through night
But the fire in my heart kept on burning until the dawn broke bright
Free and wild will always be in my hiding spot just a scout I'm not a knight
Prying used my eagle eye at the princess from a distance to my heart i can't hold tight
So keep the distance or you'll be shot she's princess you're just a scout
One last look with so much grief
Just one kiss on the lips
Just one touch of her hands in mine
Just one bottle of white french wine
my hand just slipped through her fingers as we kissed goodbye
Just one dance all the dark hours of the night slipped in moments
through her fingers we cursed the sunrise as we promised our next tryst when the 1st star shines at dusk announce the mystery of the night
As all i wanted from a princess was one kiss keeps me going through the day under the sunlight it's all gloomy dim time i can't fight
It won't matter if my heart for one second has just stopped when we part her warm kiss will keep it pumping till next time inside her chamber we reunite

Saturday, November 10, 2012

psychoses IX i was told

It was the darkest hour
The hour of the great black vampire
And there was that dark arrival
The white avenger

I don’t remember what I was told

I was told to fight

To fight myself

To maintain inner peace

Peace peace peace

I didn’t believe him

I was told to have patience

Or to strike with no mercy

And I choose peace

I was told I’m one of the arrivals

Those who brings an end of an era

Known to be the worst since the creation

And I didn’t believe

I was told many things

Think think

Do you think?

And finally I was told to love you

And I believed

In an instant

And until for ever

I’m in love with you

Friday, November 2, 2012

Psychosis VII Emptiness

Psychosis VII Emptiness

What is it when you wake up in the morning?
And all you think of is that you have no reason to live
What is that feeling of emptiness?
When you have nothing to fight for
Nothing to give
When 6000 grand thoughts are racing in your head
But it’s just a hollow
And you fell you’re dead
I’ve been to hell before
I’ve been to hell before
I’ve been 24
With a hard rock in my chest
I’m not capable of loving
Or even worse
I’m not capable of loving back
What is it when you look at your life
Memories you can’t tell if they’re real
Dreams they look surreal
And you want to tighten the loose ends
And loosen your heart a bit
I’ve been to hell before
I’ve been to hell before
I’ve been twenty four
When I lost so many loved ones
They still lives
But out of site
And out of my life
There is no turning back
Lesson learned... not really
Just one last racing thought
Even hard rocks may sigh the Goosebumps
Even zombies still have one last heart pump